


Nothing Quite Like It.

by DalekOswin



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-21
Updated: 2018-03-21
Packaged: 2019-04-05 17:37:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14049369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DalekOswin/pseuds/DalekOswin
Summary: Rodney McKay has found himself sinking into a mud pit, and, wouldn’t you know it, John Sheppard has ended up in there with him. Now all they have to do is stay calm and await rescue. Yeah, right.





	Nothing Quite Like It.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Basically just something stupid from my WIP pile.

“Oh my god. Oh my god. I’m dead. I’m really, really am dead.”

Rodney was panicking, yet again. And to be honest, John thought, under the circumstances, he could understand why. The problem was that it was making the current situation a hell of a lot worse.

“Stop squirming, McKay.” He growled. “You’re just making us sink faster.”

And sinking at an alarming rate they were. Into a smelly, sticky mud pit on a deserted planet no less. McKay was clinging to John like a small monkey, desperately trying to keep his head above the gooey muck, whilst John was using all his effort to keep a death grip on a nearby boulder.

“What do you want me to do?” McKay retorted. “If you hadn’t already noticed, we’re slowly sliding to our horrible demise in the most disgusting way possible!”

John rolled his eyes. “Trust me, I’m well aware of that. But if you stay nice and still and calm, you’ll find that we won’t be sliding to our deaths quite as quickly.”

Despite the situation, Rodney scoffed. “Oh, yeah. And just where did you learn that fact from?”

“Basic training. What to do if you end up in quicksand. You have to stay calm and still. You’re supposed spread out your weight as well, but there wasn’t enough time to do that, what with saving you and all.”

“But this is mud, not sand! And probably full of loads of alien viruses that, if we do somehow get out of this alive, will lead to all sorts of infections and-”

“Y'know, a thank you would be nice. It’s not like you were almost drowning in this stuff or anything…”

“I had it under control! At least I did until you came barreling down and landed on top of me!”

“Uh-huh.” Sheppard was unconvinced.

“But as is it, now we’re both going to die, and my nostrils are stuffed full of this muck. Do you realise how much it stinks! It’s never going to come out!”

John shifted his grip. His arms were starting to burn with the effort. “Well, If you had been paying attention to the path instead of your scanner in the first place, neither of us would be in this situation now, would we?”

“I’m telling you, that energy signature was most definitely Ancient. The readings were…” Rodney trailed off, a sudden look of panic in his eyes, flailing around wildly. “My scanner! I must’ve dropped it!”

John grunted as he felt himself slide further, the mud was starting to reach over the top of his shoulders. “Will you stay still!” He snapped, and for once Rodney obeyed, but that might have been due to suddenly sinking up to his chin, further down as he was. “Look, we can get you a new scanner.”

“Not like that you can’t. That one was custom modified.” Rodney groused.

A shadow settled over them and they looked up to see Teyla above them on the bank. Where they were stuck had evidently once been the bed of an old river, one that had carved out deep steep banks along its length. But it had long since dried up, leaving a deposit of thick gooey mud under a thin dried crust, which Rodney had broken through when he had fallen down the bank, having been too engrossed to watch his footing. Sheppard had followed close behind, having attempted to grab McKay before he fell, but had only succeeded in getting himself pulled over as well.

“Are you two all right down there?” Teyla called.

“McKay’s complaining, so we’re fine.” John called back, ignoring the ‘Hey!’ from Rodney. “Ronon reached the Gate yet?”

“Yes, he’s just radioed. A Puddle Jumper and a rescue team is on it’s way.”

Right on cue, with a familiar roar, the welcome sight of a Jumper flew overhead, effortlessly swinging around mid-air as it came into land. Through the front window, not only could Major Lorne and Dr Zelenka both be seen with wide grins on their faces as they took in the scene, but it looked like half the other Gate Teams had piled in the Jumper as well. John guessed there had been no shortage of volunteers to come pull their sorry asses out of this mess.

Beside him, Rodney left out a tremendous sigh.

“No-one’s gonna let us forget this for a long time, are they?”

And despite the cold muck slowly oozing into his BDU’s, Sheppard let out a laugh. “Nope! And guess what? Neither am I!”


End file.
